In Physio Focus

I have been staring at this white screen way too many times in the past month, wondering what I could write about. Last time I wrote it was all about doing more of what made me happy. And I did follow suit, however these opportunities were far and in between. There is a sort of lassitude that is slowly creeping in. The less I work out, the less I am motivated to do it, kind of -
"without running, what's the point?". I know it's silly, but I am slowly losing the passion, the fire that ignites my willpower. Without races on the horizon, without a coach, without a plan, it's easy to fall back into the couch potato routine.

Pretty sure I was about to cry. Thank God for that Larabar.

I managed to drag my sorry ass out for a swim every week, hot yoga once a week and a bike ride or two every week, mostly outdoors. However, I've only tried running once for 15 minutes, and that was rather uneventful. Another reason for this decrease in activity has been because I've started working with a new physio therapist and I was told to stay put. Everything has to be "easy" and no runs longer than 20 min for now. But I am very busy taking care of my hips and glutes. All physio work is targeted towards strengthening these areas, so I've been trying to be a good student and fit in as many exercises as he prescribed.

I went to see this guy, who was recommended to me by half a dozen people for being the best at fixing wonky knees and shredded IT bands. I could not afford going last year because I had maxed my physio budget before my IT bands decided to go on strike. But as the new year started, I made it a mission to have a gait analysis done and find out what it would take to fix my legs so I can return to running. His practice is just 5 min away from my office, so that worked out perfectly. The good news is that I run well and he had nothing to say about my gait. He said things like "natural ability", "great posture", "talent" blah blah blah. Maybe he was just trying to be nice. But anyway, then he went on giving me the not so nice picture about my strength. "You are nowhere near as strong as you should be for doing the kind of distances that you chose". Or rather, I am not strong in the places that I should be, like hips and glutes. I've heard this one before... But only now I've been given extremely specific exercises that target precisely those areas. And gosh, he has me working hard.

He said that if I were to do just sprint triathlons or run 5Ks, he would have just told me to go home and not bother, but since I made him understand that running long distances is important to me, he is committed to seeing me returning to doing what I love. And he wants to follow me throughout the entire season to make sure I keep on doing things right. Not once he tried to sway me away from doing long distances or to tell me that I am destroying my body, like many other therapists said before. He isn't Lisa Bentley's PT for nothing. I really liked the guy. He also took time to explain every single exercise and how it affected my body. He puts a lot of emphasis on doing all exercises with such focus and purpose, it's almost intimidating when you think about engaging all these muscles during a single stretch or exercise. Like the bridges below. Try doing them on your heels, tilting your pelvis, squeezing your butt and the legs to keep them close to each other. And don't forget to breathe. Ouch.

He has me on a 40% mobility, 40% stability and 20% strength routine. I don't have the video to share with you, but when I run, my knees collapse inwards and good running technique can only take me that far before knees and hips start complaining. It's all normal since I sit at least 10h a day and then I add more sitting on the bike. So now I have to get up every hour and stretch my hip flexors and IT bands. I have to do a variation of the "couch stretch", by using my desk, with a good posterior pelvic tilt and glute recruitment, at least 5-6 times a day. At home, I get to do daily bridges and work with bands, and a thousand jumps and core stuff. Here's what this week's torture session looked like:

• 10 x bridges 10 sec on/off 
• 10 x bridges with leg and arms lift 10 sec on/off 
• 5 x 5 lateral steps each direction with 2 bands 
• 12 cross leg stretch on step and opposite side lunge, each leg 
• 5 x 10 basic stance hops 
• 5 x 10 left leg runner forward stance hops 
• 5 x 10 right leg runner forward stance hops 
• 5 x 10 forward/backward hops 
• 5 x 10 forward/backward hops with open/close stance 
• 10 cross step and side lunge with bands, each direction 
• 10 x 10 sec low plank with arms on bosu ball
• 5 x 10 sec side plank with leg lift each side

Band Level Up! Twice the bands, twice the resistance.

Sweat makes perfect

Can you guess how sore I am? These exercises make me grunt and sweat with each step! But after 2 weeks of work, the PT seems to be happy with my progress, so fingers crossed that I'm on schedule for his 6-8 week prediction of seeing real improvement (aka no more pain while running).

What else can I share? Maybe a little more of that stuff that makes me happy? It may not have been all unicorns and rainbows, all the time, but sure it did the trick, at least for a while.

Warm enough to wear my new Coeur bike jersey

Riding my bike with hubbs

Channelling my inner cycling diva before falling on my face (true story)

I knew I could turn the gloom around. Now that was a beautiful day worth reminiscing. Just looking at these pictures makes me smile!! 

What else did I do that made me happy? 

First, I got my NCCP coaching certification. Yessir!! I am supposed to sound legit and shit when I talk triathlon now. Just don't forget to talk to your doctor before doing anything I say, mmmmkay? Not that I plan on giving up my day job for becoming a coach any time soon... But at least I keep my mind entertained with knowledge since I cannot keep my body busy with practice.

Second, I managed to renew my Hot Yoga pass! For cheap. And I'm not even a Goodlife member. Don't ask me how I did it, as it may, or may not have required a pig tail and the blood of a virgin.

Last but not least, I met a bunch of friends and we had dinners and fun together. Friends make everything better!! Here is Phaedra and I eating ALL THE SUSHI and chatting up a storm. I love this girl!

Okay, I think that's enough smiles and good news to redeem this post. What say you? Here I click Publish.

One more hiccup

Some good news would be great for a change, right? RIGHT?! Sorry to disappoint, dudes, but you can leave now if you wish. A few more shitty weeks like the ones I left behind and I call it quits. And I'm NOT a quitter, but struggling day in and day out it's getting on my nerves.

I took the stretches seriously, I was working on those like a champ. Was anything getting better? Less pain in my legs or glutes or hips while rolling, stretching, smashing, wrapping? Of course not. Less tightness in my knees? Yeah, right. I GET IT, it takes weeks and months and years... maybe an eternity to feel perfectly fine. But I am tired of trying... Aaaaarrrrghh!!! Can we go back to my body of 2 years ago, please? But I'd like to keep the Ironman if you don't mind.

If only you could hear me screaming inside. It's all muffled and it makes my ears bleed, but it's there. I need a pillow to let it out so I don't scare my kids. Hey, speaking of which, my son told me the other night that he heard me making sounds like in The Exorcist while I was trying NOT to scream too loud while I was in pain with a nerve pinched in my back, and everything else tensed and spasming like I was possessed. Say what? But of course, let's rewind...

Two weeks ago it was all about the bike and body maintenance. I went to 2 spin classes, really tough ones, and I felt really unmotivated to do any strength training, as my quality time with my roller was constantly making me aware of all aches in my body. Add even more pain to the mess? Thanks but no thanks. So anyway, come Wednesday of last week and I finally got out of my frightened stupor and decided to do a strength workout, and even better, make it count. More weight, more reps, it's time to feel the burn again!

I won't lie - I struggled. Right off the bat, I had a pretty hard time finishing my first set of "Dumbbell Alternating Shoulder Press and Twist" with 10lb in each hand. But hey, I had been doing these exercises for 3 months, I figured that maybe it was time to be able to complete a set.

If I remember correctly, the most reps I had done with this weight before was 10. But for the first set, I tried maxing it out at 12. The last 4 were a torture. I also had "Plank with Alternate Arm Extension" on the menu:

I did 12 extensions with each arm, up 2 from the previous time. The last 4 were also a killer. I felt like going into child pose and staying there forever once I finished those.

Then I did some side leg raises, where I also increased the reps by 1 from the previous session. Those were not too difficult, but they definitely made my glutes remind me how weak they are.

Then I did some "Bear Crawls", which I also maxed at 15 (up 3 from 12).

In case you don't know how these work, you crawl into a pushup position, then you lower yourself all the way to the ground, take a breath, then you push yourself back up and rewind to the starting position (upright, not shown in the picture above).

In total I did 3 sets of these 4 exercises. In the second and third attempt at the Dumbbell Shoulder Presses, I used 8lb and 5lb respectively because I figured 10lb for max reps was too much. The rest of the sets remained unchanged. It felt hard and I was pretty proud of myself when I finished it. BUT... because there is a BUT...

Right afterwards, I also went on my bike trainer to do 1h of easy spin. I do this all the time on Saturdays with the tri club - that's why they are called StrengthSpin classes after all. Really easy, nice cadence of 90+ rpm. But, because of the late start, I ended up finishing my workouts after 10pm and I decided to skip the maintenance and go straight to bed. And as soon as I lied in bed, I felt the pain on the side of my back like someone just stabbed me. I decided to ignore it because "meh" - for sure it'll be gone by the morning - and I didn't think too much about it.  I didn't have the best sleep that night for sure and in the morning, the pain was still there.

It went worse and worse throughout the day, to the point that I had to go to see the doctor at my workplace, who sent me back to my desk with a Robax Platinum. I kept on taking muscle relaxants that evening and night, because the pain even woke me up in the middle of the night and it was pretty unbearable. Went back to work again, but on Friday night, as I went to bed again, it hit me like a wrecking ball (cue in Myley Cyrus licking a hammer) and all hell broke loose.

Within 1h I could no longer breathe. It was like someone was stabbing me on the side of my abdomen with every. single. freaking. breath. Have you ever been stabbed? Me neither, but sure I never want to. It was the worst pain I've ever been in. If I recall properly, when the nurse asked me how painful it was from 1 to 10 I replied "fuuuuuuuck". That bad.

So Zin took me to the Emergency, where 2h later was given an IV of morphine, along with Gravol and a bag of Saline. I must have spent 2h in drug-land, barely conscious, talking about passing out over and over again... I don't remember much. When all the blood and urine tests came back a-ok around 4am, I was given 2 Tylenol 3 (w/ codeine) and Naproxen to go and that was it.

I spent the rest of the weekend on the couch, aside from a dinner at Queen Mother Cafe, downtown Toronto with Carol and her boyfriend - which I managed to handle pretty well thanks to being heavily medicated. Needless to say, I skipped the alcohol, but I had an amazing dessert.

And here I am again. Waiting. My massage therapist confirmed a shortened QL and nerve impingement, that miraculously went back to normal since. I am not allowed to do any exercises that twist my upper body, including shoveling snow or starting the lawn mower. I feel completely beat up after the treatment and stayed in bed today. Tomorrow may be a better day and maybe one day I can go back to swimming, and biking and running, you know.. all the stuff that keeps me happy. Sounds like a plan?

And kids? Don't try this at home.

IMMT Training Weeks 24 and 25: In damage control

Two interesting weeks to say the least. New limits found, which brought me to higher grounds both mentally and physically. Then making hard decisions and putting on the brakes where there was need to. No regrets, but ended dealing with withdrawal and guilt. This sounds like a therapy session already, so better get it started before someone falls asleep.

Swim

Coming off my biggest week of training yet, I attacked the last stretch of this building cycle like a devout athlete to its Training Peaks bible. There is only forward and this is my mission!

We celebrated Canada Day with a few workouts (why do I keep thinking fireworks?), but of course. These included a quarry swim of 2.5 loops, out of which the first one was a mission to accompany a 13yr old girl who did not want to adventure around the quarry by herself. I told her that I was a slow swimmer, and she said ok, but then ended waiting for me at each buoy. She was a fish or a mermaid, not quite sure, and man was she speedy! I managed to swim sub-19min per km, which officially made it my fastest training swim. Lesson number one: little girls kick my ass, and they don't even care to wear wetsuits.

The other 4 swims that I did were all at Professor's Lake. Twice I swam 2 loops (1.5km), once 4 loops (3km) and then a mega 5 loop (3.8km) swim, another Iron distance in the books. The day I swam the 5 loops the lake was really choppy and conditions were not ideal, but I managed to finish it all in 1h20, which makes it more and more a reality that I may swim at Mt. Tremblant in about this time or less.

Rebecca and I. She's fast!! Can't you tell?

I am proud of my sighting technique

Working on my form

I also drafted for the first time ever as I found in one of my friends from the FMCT tri club a perfect pace match. I stayed on his feet for an entire loop which made for yet another very speedy swim with very little effort, other than looking forward for bubbles and trying to spot fish at the bottom of the lake. Lesson number two: find a good pair of feet and stick to them, it may help in the (long) swim.

Tight skin

Last but not least, I upgraded my wetsuit to a Maverick Elite from ROKA Sports and it made a big difference. I swam each of the 4 loops about 1 minute faster per loop and I even negative split the entire swim. In general, while swimming with my older wetsuit, I would swim each loop slower by one minute as the time goes on, but this one seems to keep the fatigue at bay. #Win! However, getting into the wetsuit is another workout in itself. It usually takes me about 3 minutes tops to put on my Xterra, but this one is more like 15 minutes. I admit that I NEVER thought that I'd fit in it when I took it out of the package. It has a waist smaller by 2-3 inches on each side (!!) that makes it look like it was made for a Barbie. The first time I put it on (at midnight nonetheless) I had to remind myself to breathe a few times...I even did a celebratory dance. Thankfully I did not feel constricted in open water and it became more of a second skin. I am looking forward to racing in it and hopefully seeing a swim PR sometime soon.

Let's do the Midnight Boogie!

Bike

The first week I did 2 outdoor rides and one on the trainer. Someone's gotta watch So You Think You Can Dance! First outdoor ride was once more on Canada Day with Zin, my coach and 2 other friends. We rode to Belfountain for coffee and back. No ice cream this time, as I found that I'm allergic to dairy and it triggers my asthma (#FML). It was challenging and exhilarating at once as we pushed hard on the climbs and kept on bombing the downhills (recovery ride my ass!). Who said that us Canadians don't celebrate in style?

On Saturday I had on my schedule my first ever 180km ride (about 7h). I decided to do 2 loops of 90km to prepare myself mentally for seeing the same scenery twice. My coach also suggested that I do the ride solo. But since dying by myself in a ditch is not something I look forward to, I suggested another friend from the tri club, who is also doing Ironman Mt. Trmblant, to accompany me. She's about 10yr younger and super fit, so my main goal for the day, aside from remaining upright, was to keep up with her. I was so glad that our schedules matched and she said yes. It was probably a good plan not to share the route with her in advance because she would have asked that I take a psychiatric evaluation for sure. But I wanted to make this ride as truthful to the IMMT course as possible, which meant including a few steep climbs. About 8 more than at IMMT, but I hoped that she would stop counting once she was too far out to ride back by herself. I'm so mean. To help counter the feeling of wanting to murder your riding partner, I also threw in some super fast descents (what goes up must come down) which would inject enough adrenaline in our brains for a high to last a week.

10 x Cat 4 climbs on this ride. Because we can!

My friend looking good in Coeur

About to click 73.4kph on Horseshoe Hill

Time for a selfie!

The second week I did 2 trainer rides, easy so I can catch up on 24 this time. The second ride was at the track where I was supposed to do a "brick of hell" along with other peeps from the tri club, but I chose to stay on my trainer, take pictures and skip the run part because my ITBs were giving ME hell.

His and hers. I used my beloved hybrid bike.

Coach giving out instructions to the group. Boy that sounds hard!

I'm the one who doesn't sweat

I was ready to run, but stayed perched instead.

As to the last outdoor ride, since I did not start the Toronto Triathlon Festival race (will write a separate post on that), I went out in my countryside to make it count. With a strong head wind and no energy whatsoever in the legs, I rode 40km in silence with Zin drafting behind me, giving an occasional finger to drivers passing too close by me. I was in a pretty foul mood to say the least.

Run

This is where things got complicated. I had a few big weeks, all with weekend runs 22km+, but then my knees started hurting on the outside of my legs, sign that my ITBs were mad at me. I went for massage therapy, iced, Advil-ed, elevated, foam rolled... but every time I would run the pain would return after 2km. I have no pain when I walk or rest, so it's hard for me to know if I can run until I actually try. So the theme of these past 2 weeks has been "will I or will I not finish my runs"?

The first week I ran 7.5km on Thursday after the swim and it wasn't too bad. On Saturday I was still feeling like a million bucks, with a run off the bike that I could have turned into a marathon if I had listened to my adrenaline-filled brain.  But then on Sunday, the day of my long run, it all turned into a huge #fail. I put on my magic Coeur kit, my bouncy On shoes, my HTFU cap, I even took my favorite water bottle with me, and despite waking up at 5am to get this day started with a #win, I turned around after 2km, cursing my body for giving up on me.

Made the decision not to run until Thursday, hence my track workout-brick turned into a spin, but then the same thing happened, pain came back after 2km during my short loop around the lake. WTF! More rest ensued, with the decision of pulling out of the race on Sunday made in the last seconds before I fell asleep on Saturday. For now I have been ordered to stay off my feet and run in the water for the rest of the week. I won a race entry for Saturday at the Belwood Tri, which must have been a sign that I should skip TTF. I will run there (7.5km) and see how my legs feel.

In a nutshell

Went from 15h of workouts in the first week to 5h in the next. It was supposed to be a rest week anyway, but the fact that my knees/ITBs started bothering me was definitely NOT in the plan. I have to adjust my workouts in the next two weeks and reassess the damage as I go, but this should not be deal breaker me thinks. Just need to take it easy and let me body bounce back. With the last 180km long ride, and the open water swims that I managed to complete in very decent times, I feel a thousand times more confident about IMMT. I made a smart decision not to race and listened to my body and intuition. My coach should be proud because he always says that my enthusiasm gets in the way of my reasoning. I hope to be back with better news in the next recap. Onward and upward!

Baby steps

Wooohooo, the workouts are back! Okay, maybe there isn't much to talk about, but enough to get me excited, damn right!! I swam, I biked and I ran! Went to the pool a few times - thrice, more precisely, and increased my mileage from 1200m to 1400m in two weeks, going from sets of 100s to 200s, all with flipturns!! I sense a new season kick-starting soon ;-)

Tan lines, vintage bathing suits, goggle marks and empty pools.

Let's do this!

Good news is that my core is what hurt the most after these pool workouts. I must be doing something right. As for the flip turns, they don't make me feel like death anymore, so that's definitely progress! Just keep flippin', just keep flippin'... ummm, yea, something like that.

Then I went on the bike trainer, once, for 15 minutes, smallest gear. I must have elevated my heart rate for at least 1bpm, I even broke a sweat, despite the fan blowing sub-arctic air in my face. My hip bursa decided to act up 30 minutes later, so I didn't try again since. But at least I managed to make something flare, you know - cause and effect - because Google isn't that great at diagnosing mysterious injuries without a good cause. Needless to say, I took a little break afterwards, but there was one more thing to take care of before the end of the year.

I promised myself I'd run a mile if the injury didn't get worse. As soon as the bursa stopped hurting again, I put on my running shoes and went out. I wanted to run between 10 and 15 minutes, and I did a little loop around the block for a total of 12 minutes. Almost 2km! Yay me!! However, that was no easy feat. The road conditions were horrible, there was ice everywhere and I wasn't keen on falling on my face and breaking something else.

Ice and snow - watch your step!

So today I went with hubbs to the gym and ran for 20 min on the treadmill (1% incline). This time I ran 3.2km, and I even threw in a few strength exercises and stretches at the end.

Verdict? Nothing got worse. There might be hope after all. Here's to a promising 2014, and dare I say, pain free! Cheers, everyone, and a very Happy New Year!

Workout of the Day: Dying my hair at home

This is my first official update for the "40 steps to 40" project since I finally managed to cross off the list a goal: dying my hair at home. A workout of sorts, hence its own blog post.

First, I looked through my cabinet under the sink for the hair color box, which I must have bought sometime last year. In the process, I had to take out a large amount of items that were stored there, then put them back. Three minutes of lifting weights of 100g to 250g each, plus some leg, back and arm stretches.

I then prepared the dye by mixing several smelly potions together, then shook the bottle vigorously for a minute. Maybe this wasn't as difficult as Shake Weight, but it definitely made my right arm work a little.

I then applied the dye all over my hair, holding both my arms up for a total of 5 minutes at least, massaging my scalp lightly. Not sure how many muscle groups were used there, but for sure some shoulder, back and chest muscles were put to test.

After finishing the coloring, I proceeded to lying down on my bed and checking several social media websites for a total of 25 minutes. While on my stomach, I also did my glute exercises prescribed by my PT: 2 x 10 leg raises, each leg, bent at the knee, as well as other random leg movements that I don't remember.

Back in the bathroom, I then washed my hair while kneeling down and crouching, for a total of 5 more minutes. More work for the glutes, and some core work for keeping myself balanced while on my knees. Add holding my arms up and massaging my scalp all this time, a total body workout!

Got up (that totally counted as a squat) and applied magic conditioner cream to my hair. 1 more minute with my arms up. 

Back to crouching by the shower to wash my hair again, about 1 minute. Up once more (squat, yay!), then drying my hair, moving my arms while holding the towel, weight about 300g-400g wet.

And this is the result.

Abracadabra, no more gray hair!

Who's hot now, eh?

Damn, this workout made me look fabulous! I was feeling so good afterwards, that I even went on my bike trainer for 15 minutes (for the first time since Nov 30), on the lowest gear and I didn't get any pain. And to end the day, I put on my winter coat and went outside to walk for 2km in the snow.

This may not help burn the 8lb that I put on since I stopped exercising, but it's a start. Merry Christmas to me! A pain free day was the best gift today!

Never two without three

I remember writing on December 3rd...

One: GTPS (Greater trochanteric pain syndrome, aka hip bursitis)
Two: ITBS (Iliotibial band syndrome, aka mother effing IT band hell)
Three: hey, don't you think that's enough?!

It's now two weeks later and I feel that it's time for an update on my injuries, since I cannot update you on my workouts for not having done any.

I have been mostly sitting on my butt, literally, which is another issue in itself. Why? Because 4 physio therapy appointments later, I still have pain in my right hip radiating into my lateral hip muscles/tendons and into my quads whenever it feels like it. And it's not that painful either, but it's nagging. It's there to remind me every day that I'm not getting off that easy.

So today I had my 5th physio appointment and my therapist wasn't very impressed with my progress, even though she told me that I was only halfway into the treatment and that I should be patient. While I was lying on my good side, she started poking at my butt cheek, around the original site of the hip bursitis, but a little more towards the back, away from the hip. A minute later, she hit a spot and I screamed in pain. WTF was that!? The answer was "Oh, poor Irina, it's your piriformis".

So to add another injury to an injury, there is a number three after all:

Three : Piriformis strain (aka MORE pain in the butt)

Most likely it's been there since the beginning, but hidden by the most acute pain, coming from the hip and the ITB. Now that the first two have subsided, the deeper aches start to surface. Again it is hard to pinpoint exactly what happened. I may never know, but one thing I do know, is that I do a lot of things that prevent it to heal. Sitting all day and putting pressure on the strain is the worst. First change I need to make is to buy an inflatable donut cushion (or sit on my exercise ball - great idea, thanks Marlene). That's going to be interesting. Next, I need to stop crossing my legs when I sit. At home, whenever I lie down on the couch, my legs are always crossed as well. Last but not least, my PT noticed that I always point my feet inward, even when I rest. This is "mechanically" bad and I should stop doing it.

To treat it, ICE is my friend, as often as I can, especially during the day. Thankfully I'll be on vacation next week, and I can R.I.C.E all day long. Copious amounts of wine and chocolate should also help. Until then, I'll be waiting for a sign, and that sign is SILENCE (total Silence of The Lambs reference there). No more screaming in my hip, leg and butt cheek. And when that happens, I'm going to celebrate with some more wine and chocolate. Then hop on my bike for an easy spin, maybe a 15 min jog and a few easy laps in the pool (rest assured, not all at once). The New Year needs to start off the right foot, and not because it's at the bottom of my good leg. The New Year is going to be PAIN FREE and I know it's possible. I don't believe in miracles, but I believe in the power of positive thinking. I am going to get better.

This is not a very serious injury, I hope. But I am treating it with caution because it could blow up as quickly as it showed up, uninvited, that is. This is my year and nothing can take it away from me. It's better now than later (*taking notes for the next time that I start crying*).

I am going to get better. I am going to get better. I am going to get better....

Hang in there my friends... I'll be back in a jiffy!

Letting go of guilt

It's been a week post injury and after spending all my free time asking myself the same question over and over again - "why?" - I think I am finally ready to move on and let more constructive thoughts occupy my brain. The "why" of the matter may just be impossible to answer. I talked to a few people, they all have their own theory - I have none. I've always thought that I knew myself so well, that I didn't see this coming - at all. For sure, I took my time to rest and the workouts that I did, they were no different in intensity than what I did over the summer. Maybe I overdid it at Yoga. Maybe I had too much fun bowling, or maybe doing single leg drills on the bike ad nauseatum was the last nail in the coffin, but if injuries were a science, we would know how to prevent them 100% of the time.

For some people, getting injured during the training cycle is like a badge of honor. "I took my body to the limit" - yeah, maybe, but I don't see who really enjoys being sidelined. Everyone I know got injured over the past 3 years, and maybe my turn came because I have been so damn lucky all this time. Either way, it's been hard not to think that I did this to myself (but of course I did! who am I kidding) and maybe that I should have listened to coach and not run the Hamilton Marathon. But I did listen to my body - and never, not once I had pain in my hip. Achy knees, sure, the whole year they kept reminding me that everything around them was tight: muscles, tendons, whatever. Was I always stretching, rolling, icing, massaging? Far from it. Just like Sam, my favorite healing method is to stare at my muscles and hope they repair themselves. No kidding, I must be champion at healing by telekinesis.

So anyway, here I am, torturing my brain, day in and day out, wondering, why am I my worst enemy and freaking out, of course, because "did I just break myself for good?". What about the IRONMAN?! If I break now, will I end up in a million pieces by the time August comes? Oh you have no idea what kind of thoughts circle inside my head at 300km/h. And they make me exhausted with guilt. A week and 3 physio therapy appointments later, the hip pain improved dramatically, I even went to the pool today and did a bit of aqua-jogging and swimming with my pull buoy. But some pain is still there, still reminding me of my "negligence". Another week of minimum walking, no running and no biking should do the trick, I can only hope. I have another PT appointment tomorrow and we shall take it from there... Will I be able to return to my favorite activities? I better be, or I'm going to LOSE IT.

Until then, guilt begone!! I am a runner, I am a triathlete, I am legit, dammit. I may not be training for the Olympics, but I'd rather be happy and deal with a little injury than bang my head against the inside a bubble wrap.

So, I'm having some... ummm, technical difficulties

To be more specific -

One: GTPS (Greater trochanteric pain syndrome, aka hip bursitis, aka pain in the butt)
Two: ITBS (Iliotibial band syndrome, aka mother effing IT band hell)
Three: hey, don't you think that's enough?!

So. Nothing until pain goes away. Not even massage, rolling, stretching, yoga, walking or swimming (unless it's with a pull buoy).

There is no other explanation than a change in routine. My physio therapist said it's most likely because of going all out in yoga, swimming and biking after resting for weeks. And let's not forget bowling, which I had not done in years (mandatory corporate fun day will always bite me in the butt, literally)!! All those workouts taxed the hip big time and the fact that I only did them once a week did not help either. Given that I reduced the intensity of workouts from 100% to 5% after my last triathlon, then I went back to doing long and hard bike spins, pool sprints, and holding the pigeon pose for 3 minutes (because I'm such an over achiever), it was just "too much too soon". And I thought that looking at this schedule, I was a lazy bum.

Well, I was, but I should have started back gradually that is. It is not clear whether the ITBS is a result of the GTPS or vice versa, but bottom line, I've got horrible pain from the hip all the way down my leg when I walk, with a bad limp and achy wobbling in the knee. Speaking of the knee, my physio is worried that my left knee is quite unstable, which explains a few things. But I will talk more about this with her after I stop hurting. Good thing is that it's an acute injury and I got it early.

Until then, fire away. Call me all names that you want, I deserve them.
L O S E R is a good start me thinks.

Ouch. To be continued.