Because they're worth it

I started this blog post 10 days ago, then we went on vacation to Mt. Tremblant where hubby participated in his first full Ironman. You will have to wait for a future blog post to read how it all went down, because for now I want to finish this one... So time shift your brain to 2 weeks ago, then read below...

I had a very rewarding week, and not from beating any records or piling miles in crazy workouts, but from spending quality time with my family and friends. And it felt really good to be able to arrange my life around these moments.

As I was saying in the previous blog post, on Wednesday I gave up my Taekwondo workout for a trip downtown with my older son to watch the Blue Jays game. Not only the Jays won, but the evening delivered another surprise in meeting Kari and Dorothy, my IM Muskoka finish line friends who were in TO for their honeymoon fun filled activities. Can you tell how happy I was?

Kari takes awesome pics. How do you like my 'do?

I am totally crashing their girls' night out

The next day, on Thursday, I gave up my Taekwondo class again (I hope my instructor does not read this), this time for a friend of mine, Amy, a runner who signed up for her first try a tri in a couple of weeks and needed a bit of confidence building in open water. I suggested Professor's Lake as one of the best places to try, since we have lifeguards and a manageable 750m loop, and a lot of people around to help with encouragement and tips. Besides, I had planned to swim with her and make sure that she is as comfortable in the water as possible. If I can say, my mission has always been to help people fall in love with open water swimming the same way I did a few years ago. I know it's a tough task because humans are not natural swimmers, but I'm always up for it.

The lake was warm and quiet and we beat the storm by a hair. Moreover, I think Amy enjoyed herself in the water and I truly hope that it helped her for her upcoming race. I swam a loop with her and one by myself, and managed to find my zen at the end of the day, which is always my goal.

The next day I tried going to Taekwondo again (I swear!), but just as I pulled in the school's parking lot, Zin called me and asked that I pick him up after getting two flats on the bike. He was stranded somewhere in Caledon and like a good wifey and sherpa, I drove there right away and rescued him. Yep, he was also worth it.

On Saturday I fulfilled my sherpa duties again, by driving Zin to Cambridge where he picked up his race wheels after having them serviced by Chris from 3Sixty5 Cycling (and one of our club founding members if you didn't know). Zin's plan was to ride back home from Cambridge, a total of 100km, but his plan eventually got aborted after a monster storm hit our area and he had to be picked up again. Poor guy he was soaked to the bone and survived dodging tree branches flying across the road. I knew this was going to be a bad storm as soon as I heard tornado warnings on the radio and indeed, it was pretty scary out there. So glad that I could help though.

In the afternoon I finally made it to Taekwondo!! YAY ME!! It was a super hard workout which made up for the sessions missed during the week, and gave me additional confidence for the upcoming belt grading on the 27th of August. With each of these classes I learn a little more, so hopefully it sticks for long enough to become muscle and brain memory.

Weather wise, Mother Nature ended her temper tantrum on time for us to go back to Professor's Lake on Sunday for another open water swim with the club. At the last minute, Phaedra decided to join us as well, and she suggested that we do a bike ride together afterwards. I could not be more excited since we had never ridden together before and it was definitely time to catch up on life, etc. As for me, catching her up on the bike... that was another story, haha. She isn't an AG champion for nothing.

The swim was pretty awesome, as usual. Did my two loops, then had some fun trying to fulfill my social media duties by capturing the moment. No iPhones were harmed in this picture, but it was close. Above is Phaedra's version, below is mine. Isn't it fun to see different perspectives?

We then headed to our place to start the ride. Zin did a tube change on Phadra's bike because it had suspiciously leaked a lot of air, then we were on our way, direction Erin for butter tarts.

As I had anticipated, I had a lot of fun, in a torturous kind of way, leading most of the time because not only I was scared to let Phaedra pull me above my abilities, but also because it was a new route for her and it was polite that I showed the way. It was super hot and since we started the ride pretty late, we struggled at times, but we still enjoyed ourselves, especially on the downhills. Phaedra is a girl after my heart, taking off at times to HAMMER DOWN (then she had to wait for me, with enough time to have pizza delivered). I hope she beat enough records that day. I know for one that I got a few Strava PRs and an Extreme Suffer Score. What?? Not EPIC?? I must be getting better... I should ride with them fast girls more often. ;-)

You can read the suffer scores on our face. And I tried competing for the craziest 'do, but Phaedra still won.

And that's about it for the week before the last. All in all, I chose to spend quality time with those close to my heart and at the end of the day, I had zero regrets. No workouts are worth more than friendships. I even Face Timed with my best friend from France, but I know she'd kill me if I posted here the great screen shot that I took during our call. These moments always bring the best smiles, the smiles that make our jaw hurt and remind us that we are not alone. A good friend is never too far, you just have to pick up the phone or send a text. You never know how the stars align and you get to spend the best of times. To many more like these!! <3 Thank you my friends!

Redefining friendship on social media

Today I've unfriended more than 30 people on Facebook. It may have been you, or one of your friends. It is not often that I talk about my "friends" as defined by social media, but given that I've spent every single second of my last run mulling the contents of this blog post, which continued to torture me today, I had to do something about it. This was not an easy decision. As a matter of fact, I've been debating it for over a year, but only recently it started to consume me to the point where it's been affecting my emotional well being. If you've followed me long enough, you should know that I take my mental health pretty seriously. Because if I weren't... I wouldn't be here to talk about it.

The next question is obviously WHY. And the answer is very simple: because being connected to these people HURTS. How?? See, I wear my heart on the sleeve. I am an extrovert, not shy of giving compliments (and they are always genuine) or telling someone that I like them and that I want to be their friend. With some of these people I did just that, months or even years ago. Because I really cared about them. Many of them inspire me on a daily basis and I know that they are GOOD people. But they all have something in common: they don't care about me (or if they do, they never showed it). Some of them may consider me a weirdo, a groupie, a fan, or purely an annoyance to whom they rest connected for reasons that I cannot comprehend. Connecting on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram for the sake of it, because we're teammates, because we share the same hobby, because of curiosity, because it may turn into a business opportunity, or a sale opportunity, because we want to keep tabs on each other, or who knows what other stupid reason devoid of care, compassion or empathy - it's not for me. I am not strong, nor superficial enough for it.

Sometimes I admit, I accept friendship requests too quickly, but I always take the time and try to connect with the person. If they don't reciprocate in any shape or form, if they never answer my questions, comments or concerns, if they never share my enthusiasm, or never Like something that makes me happy, it becomes a relationship that I'm uncomfortable with. I put so much energy into every single one of the connections that I make, that after a while it starts eating me at the core that this person doesn't give a shit. And so I unfriend, to protect myself from these feelings that can become a real burden on my psyche.

Lately there has also been another trend on some of the blogs I read. Their authors feel a sense of pride in making declarations that end up hurting more than they can imagine, such as "I never take selfies", "I don't eat sugar" or "I never weigh myself", or "I never run in skirts". For all of us who do take selfies, obsess with the scale, enjoy a dessert every once in a while, or just find running skirts extremely comfortable - those statements make us feel like shit because they ARE judgmental. The author may not say it out loud, but they must find comfort in knowing that they are better than us, the other 99%. The effort that I need to put in justifying these statements for those who make them it's seriously draining. Maybe they don't mean it, or maybe it's their way of reassuring themselves. Who am I to tell them what to write on their own virtual space anyway? So I rather take a bow and retreat in my own corner of the Internet.

Last but not least, I've unfriended a bunch of triathletes that I've connected with via the groups that I belong to on Facebook. Some of these people are pros, or full time coaches, or people who only share, breathe and live triathlon. These people are obviously too busy to connect with their audience, or choose not to waste their energy on people who are not part of their immediate circle - thus ignoring 90% of their connections (and they do have a shit ton of social media friends, so I can understand the "noise" that must be surrounding them). But while they are inspiring in their dedication to beating PRs, qualifying for Kona, or getting the most defined and toned body, they also could benefit from showing their human side: failures, injuries, stretch marks, DNFs. People who only show the "perfect" side of their lives, only mingle with other pros or "fast" people, or spend half their time plugging their sponsors, make me angry. Anger is something that I've been feeling more and more lately and it doesn't make me a better person. So, I had to unfriend these people as well to shield myself from the shitty feelings that get triggered whenever I open social media and stumble on them.

I have no intention in changing any of these people. They all do what they want with their lives, their friends, their hobbies. And I do the same with mine. We all want the best for ourselves, that's for sure. So anyway, I really do hate these kind of posts and I am still debating whether to publish this, but maybe something good will come out of it, who knows.